McCain flip flops in Ohio

In Ohio on Monday, McCain said “The war will be over soon.” Soon is relative, of course. Maybe in another 100 years or so. In fact, the picture of him above, with Nixon, was taken nearly 100 years ago!

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Flaherty reveals too much in budget

Jim Flaherty, the Finance Minister, unveiled the Conservative budget today. Critics have suggested that demonstrating the size of his member, pictured above, was just too much. Stephane Dion says the budget is not bad enough to reject and says that the Finance Minister’s lack of endowment deserves a pity vote.

Mulroney sex scandal

Brian Mulroney, former PM, refuses to appear before an ethics committee regarding his impropriety with Karlheinz Schreiber. He flatly denies having sexual relations with Schreiber. Schreiber, on the other hand, insists he has the semen stained blue pants from the Gap to prove it.

Reporter backlash for Stelmach

Ed Stelmach, Alberta premier, has been shady with his job loss statistics related to a cap in carbon emissions. But after reporters threatened to shove their microphones up his ass, he came clean and altered his message.

Courting the Latino Vote

With the upcoming Texas primaries, the Republicans will be trying to court the latino vote, which may have strayed. Dying to campaign for any of the nominees, GWB has resorted to photo ops with one of his illegitimate (and sober) daughters, Juanita.

Cindy McCain is sexy!

Cindy McCain, the hot conservative wife of Republican nominee John McCain, was campaigning for her husband at an anti-puppy rally in Ohio yesterday.

Mellencampy McCain Rallies

John “the Cougar” Mellencamp recently asked John “the Craddle-robber” McCain to stop playing his music at political rallies. It seems to me that the two Johns have more in common than they think. Pictured here is Cougar and his wife, Cindy.