CNN makes false conclusions

Here’s an excerpt from “Clinton at risk of losing latino vote” by Ruben Navarette at CNN: “A recent Gallup survey found Obama in a slight, but not statistically significant, lead over Clinton among Latinos. Obama-mania has gone multicultural. And it’s about time.”

The scientific fallacy behind this statement is so blatantly obvious to us here at Right Wing Crazies. You CANNOT draw conclusions from statistically insignificant findings. It’s rule numero uno for any scientist. Why is CNN exhibiting bias? Are you surprised? We think Ruben is a closet Obama “fan” and he should leave the factual reporting to those most qualified. Shame on you CNN!

Hillaria Clintone: El Presidenta?

Apparently the new hot topic is that if Hillary Clinton loses the nomination to Barack Hussein Obama, it is because of the lack of latino votes! I say she crosses the border, not to the Taco Bell side but North, we’ll take her!

McCain versus Obama: A Throwdown

John McCain and Barack Obama are exchanging heated words over Iraq. McCain is basically pulling a Bush “weapons of mass destruction.” McCain better be careful or people in Florida might start to think he is really George Bush and vote for Nader instead.

He so crazy!

It’s pretty obvious that John McCain is going to take the Republican primaries. However, exhibiting the usual craziness, Huckabee has issued a formal debate request (aka challenge). You gotta love how crazy Huckabee is! p.s. Doesn’t he look Italian in this photo?!

Holy Hussein

John McCain is distancing himself from a right wing crazy that made disparaging remarks about Barack Obama at a McCain rally. The crazy in question kept referring to Obama by his middle name, Hussein.

Search for the HOTTEST Conservative

Here at “Abstraction Reaction” we are dedicated to finding the best political story leads in the news. For once, we’d like to start one. We are searching for the HOTTEST, the sexiest, Conservative out there. So far in our list, we’ve blogged about John McCain’s wife, Cindy and his daughter, Cindy.

Representing (for Canada) is Rona Ambrose, the former Minister of the Environment. She’s smart, sexy and sassy!

Way Back Playback

Remember when Harper tried to pass off the Clean Air Act as something useful? He thinks a “thumbs up” can shut us up. Poor Rona Ambrose, the former Environment Minister, just stood there and later took the fall. Since Belinda Stronach left the party, Ambrose is definitely the hottest Conservative in government.

Liberals pissed at quiet Mulroney

The Liberals are fuming mad and say that “silence speaks volumes” after Brian Mulroney (an early photo is pictured above) refused to testify before the ethics committee.

Flaherty points smelly finger

Jim Flaherty, the Canadian Finance Minister, is criticizing American Democratic candidates for suggesting they may consider pulling out of NAFTA. After smelling his finger, Obama and Clinton agree, the further the better.

Clash of the titans!

Key primaries in Texas and Ohio are coming up and the two Democratic front runners are debating over campaign tactics. John McCain missed the whole thing because of his hearing loss caused by excessive aging.

Republican mascot still no head

The Senate Republicans have finally agreed to an Iraq debate. Democrats had expected them to block debate on the bill. What the Republicans really need to do is to add a head to their mascot; it’s all tail and feet!

Daily MacRice Photo!!!!!!!!

It must be love…

McCain holds out on name of plastic surgeon

Senator John McCain refuses to provide details about a loan and attempts to withdraw from the public election funds program. He has also failed to provide the name of his plastic surgeon and the brand of facial moisturizer he uses to keep that taut complexion.

McCain flip flops in Ohio

In Ohio on Monday, McCain said “The war will be over soon.” Soon is relative, of course. Maybe in another 100 years or so. In fact, the picture of him above, with Nixon, was taken nearly 100 years ago!

Flaherty reveals too much in budget

Jim Flaherty, the Finance Minister, unveiled the Conservative budget today. Critics have suggested that demonstrating the size of his member, pictured above, was just too much. Stephane Dion says the budget is not bad enough to reject and says that the Finance Minister’s lack of endowment deserves a pity vote.

Mulroney sex scandal

Brian Mulroney, former PM, refuses to appear before an ethics committee regarding his impropriety with Karlheinz Schreiber. He flatly denies having sexual relations with Schreiber. Schreiber, on the other hand, insists he has the semen stained blue pants from the Gap to prove it.

Reporter backlash for Stelmach

Ed Stelmach, Alberta premier, has been shady with his job loss statistics related to a cap in carbon emissions. But after reporters threatened to shove their microphones up his ass, he came clean and altered his message.

Courting the Latino Vote

With the upcoming Texas primaries, the Republicans will be trying to court the latino vote, which may have strayed. Dying to campaign for any of the nominees, GWB has resorted to photo ops with one of his illegitimate (and sober) daughters, Juanita.

Cindy McCain is sexy!

Cindy McCain, the hot conservative wife of Republican nominee John McCain, was campaigning for her husband at an anti-puppy rally in Ohio yesterday.

Mellencampy McCain Rallies

John “the Cougar” Mellencamp recently asked John “the Craddle-robber” McCain to stop playing his music at political rallies. It seems to me that the two Johns have more in common than they think. Pictured here is Cougar and his wife, Cindy.